Albus the Fat Cat and My Kiddies

After a six and half hour rehearsal for A Wrinkle in Time, it's quite wonderful falling onto our couch next to Albus, the fat black cat. He's not OUR fat black cat, but our neighbor's. (: Hello, Albus.

Mostly this post is just an excuse to share the CUTE faces of the kids I get to see everyday. (: Today we got out the bikes and there was perfect mayhem on the playground. Sigh. I am still learning names! Sorry I don't know all of them. ):

Andrew's just two, so he couldn't get on the bigger bikes. He was quite put out, until I whipped out my camera and snapped a picture of him! haha A smile beamed across his face.

Asia's my little helper and likes it when I'm her baby girl and she's the mom. We go on frequent shopping trips to Walmart and buy Chicken Nuggets. haha The purple thing she's holding is a small bunny named after my mom's first name, "Alicia." I had to sing the bunny to sleep because she had allergies and multiple boo-boos. (:

These two are quite the duo. I don't remember the other's name, but she's a sweetheart and likes to show me her ballerina moves.

I LOVE HIM. SO MUCH. Ryder loves helping me and asking me questions and proposing to all the girls on the playground. He asked me to marry him the other day and gave me a flower. He's seriously the sweetest little boy. The other day he asked me to get all the babies so he could hold them. He wanted to hold the babies. !!! Today he asked me to help him find his Spiderman action figure. In his words, "I have a toy and his name is Spiderman." !!!!! CAN YOU HANDLE IT?!

Andrew totters after me all day long. (:

I don't remember this awesome dude's name, but he's pretty stinkin' cool. He almost karate chopped me.

My first official day, Jasmine came home from school with the other big kids and saw me on the playground. She shouted, "Chelsea!!!" and then catapulted herself in the air and hugged me tight.

Basically, I don't deserve the life I'm living, but somehow I am anyway.

Home Alone

Long time no see you guys! Ah! How are you? I hope stupendous. (:

Life's been pretty amazing as of late. Writing screenplays for a hopeful job, spending my mornings with four and five year olds, and plowing through five hour rehearsals almost every weeknight with 8 hour rehearsals on Saturdays for A Wrinkle in Time. Tonight, I had a night off...so I'm chowing down on some leftover Cafe Rio in my pajamas. Haha No shame. Our new home feels so good to be in alone. It feels like I'm in a small, fraying pocket inside a cozy sweater that cuddles close. Yeah. Perfection.

Zac's at work until later on tonight and I'm enjoying the time to think and jam out to my music and clean the house before his return. Blink 182, Mayday Parade, Lights...Ah. Doesn't get much better than that. (:

After three sessions at the preschool, I CAN'T BELIEVE MY LIFE. I've given and gotten hugs. I've flapped my butterfly arms and helped the kids perform monkey bar flips. I look forward to waking up early and spending my mornings with them. Hearing them call me "Teacher" melts my heart. It's wonderful teaching them my name, them stuttering it out, and forgetting just seconds later. GAH. KIDS.

A Wrinkle in Time has finally entered into tech week and we go up next Wednesday for an audience. WHAT. Mrs Who's super pumped to get her sassiness onstage for all the kiddies. (: I feel like I've finally got Mrs Who pegged down for my body and voice. It took a while and a lot of patience from everyone, but I'm so glad they were so encouraging. If you can come, do, please! May 29th-June 15th. You can get tickets here. (:

GRADUATION 13 DAYS AWAY.

*Note: I am wearing someone else's clothes. hahaha Awesome story time: After rehearsal last night, Zac and I hung out with an amazing couple in the ward, named Zac and Mary. YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT. Our husband's names are the same. Also, Mary and I are the same size...maybe even the same person. Zac and I stayed the night at their apartment last night and I ended up wearing Mary's clothes to rehearsal...

In rehearsal at the moment for A Wrinkle in Time. Until 5pm. I'm a hot mess...and finals week will soon be upon us. Guys. Graduation. Graduation in 13 days. Most of my finals will be a breeze, the storm has almost passed. I just need to work on my fiction portfolio, edit my full length play, and finish up a few more assignments. Overall, a finals week I'm pretty excited to work on! (: Heck yes for writing.

Speaking of writing, I feel you guys should know what I've been working on this semester. My fiction class has been a blast, writing three different short stories: Flash Fiction (750 words or less), One Night Story (1,000 words and occurring in a specific amount of time-like one night), and the Fragmented Story (At least 3,000 words and fragmented). My fragmented story will be finished this weekend and I can't wait to get feedback on it! (:

My full length play has actually been finished for about three weeks now. I wrote the first draft (91 pages) in 9 days. Yeah. I'm a beast. I had to meet the deadline for WDA Workshop (Writers, Dramaturgs, Actors) for the upcoming fall semester. You wanna know what it's about?! I'mma tell you the "official" synopsis I came up with on my resume. (: "Bring Her Back, a family drama full-length. An alcoholic graphic novelist grapples with his daughter’s death by escaping into his comic book world." BALLA. Now I just have two years ahead of me, revising and editing and revising again...Getting ready for grad school applications. (: And perhaps a production along with way? ....(: 

Haha Not necessarily legible, but impressive! (:

kcactf: part v :)

Good morning! I have some awesome news: I am cast as Mrs. Who in BYU's production of A Wrinkle in Time! Rehearsals will begin soon and I seriously can't wait to get going. Our cast is already phenomenal and it's gonna be insane seeing what we all come up with together. The show goes up after I'm graduated (May 29-June 15), so I have something to look forward to immediately after graduation. GUYS GRADUATION. I WILL BE GRADUATED IN 51 DAYS. Ahhhh! Okay, enough of that Tom Foolery.

It's time for the last post in the series about KCACTF. :) Drum roll please...

***

The last workshop I attended at the festival was “Playwriting for Children.” Though the directions of our hands on activity were confusing at first, in the end, we created a “Choose Your Own Adventure Play” about Paul Revere’s ride. Lindsay and I acted out our script (complete with horseback riding) and it was a blast! We had the best time and, once again, I couldn’t believe I was living my life.

Later that night, I attended the acting Irene Ryan Final rounds with friends and couldn’t believe how awesome our BYU students did! After the final rounds was the Award Ceremony.

THIS WAS IT.

I sat in the end seat next to the aisle. One of the other ten minute playwrights sat behind me and congratulated me on my performance that morning. I was so touched and congratulated her as well. As Wade talked about the NPP (National Playwriting Program) and how the awards worked for the playwrights, all of my BYU friends gave me their full attention. My hands were held, my back was rubbed and everyone was smiling at me. I was called up with the other four playwrights and received my “Regional Finalist” certificate. The entire BYU group stood up and cheered me on. It was beautiful. I somehow made it back to my chair and then Wade continued introducing the two “National Semi-Finalists.” At this point, I couldn’t stop thinking, “It’s not gonna be me. I’m not gonna get it.” Over and over again. It was agonizing. Jacob Shamy gripped my hand tight and I repeated, “It’s gonna be fine. It’s gonna be fine.”

And then the moment I’d been waiting for all week.

Wade called up the playwright sitting behind me as the first National Semi-Finalist. She glided up, accepted her award and floated back to her chair. I remember thinking, “Well, I’m done for.”

Then I heard my name. I heard “The Shoelace.” I heard my friends screaming. I heard myself screaming and crying and laughing and then couldn’t feel my legs as I stumbled up to Wade…I almost fainted, I almost felt like I wasn’t real, but it was real and I was alive and breathing and this was my moment. When Wade handed me my certificate, I shook his hand and it brought me back to the room screaming for me. The cameras flashing in my face. The epitome of pride and love washing over me from my friends I’d grown to know as family. The knowledge that Heavenly Father answers prayers. The acknowledgement of who I am as a Daughter of God. The acceptance of myself as a playwright.

I somehow made it back to my chair and I sobbed into Lindsay’s arms. She held me tight as I cried into her shoulder, overcome with too many emotions. Everyone looked on and I could feel their love. I held on. My back was rubbed, tissues were handed to me, and I couldn’t believe this was happening to me. I kept saying, “This isn’t real. This didn’t just happen.” But then I’d stop myself and realize IT WAS. This was my life. My moment.

Whatever happens now, I am just so grateful for the blessings that have come of this week. I am full of wonder. I am full of light.

kcactf: part iv

Good morning everyone!
Just got two texts from Zac, both of them saying "Quack, quack." He's adorable. :) Alllright. I promised you an amazing journal entry for today. My last day in LA: The Staged Reading. haha It's gonna be SAWEET! Tomorrow will be the last day in the series, complete with an Andy Warhol production (AH), a "Playwriting for Children" workshop, and the Awards Ceremony. ...:) Until then, enjoy the crazy endorphins and adrenaline I experienced on the morning of February 16, 2013.

February 16, 2013

Dear Journal,

TODAY WAS INSANE.

I woke up with tons of butterflies in my stomach and tried not to freak out on my roommates. After a quick shower, I got ready as fast as possible. The nerves were too much for my body to handle. Everyone wished me luck as I ran out of the hotel room and slammed the door behind me.

My play was going to be performed for the first time in two hours.

As I rushed through the streets to the LATC, I found myself floating. Noelle, Heather, Adam, and other friends went with me, keeping me grounded and focused for the morning ahead. They were all so supportive and encouraging—it was exactly what I needed and I couldn’t thank them enough.

Noelle and I got to the theatre and met up with Carol, Aurora, and Dillon. Tech rehearsals started and we watched as each ten minute play did their thing. The butterflies multiplied as our performance grew closer. Then, all of a sudden, it was time for our tech rehearsal to take the stage. It was beautiful witnessing Noelle and Dillon connect with one another.

After the tech rehearsal, Dillon asked if he could talk with me. We moved away from everyone else and he leaned in close to me. He said, “So…I prayed last night.” Shock. Complete shock and love in an instant. I asked him, “You did?” He continued, “I felt like your script deserved it…and like you deserved it.” I couldn’t speak for a long while but then I found the words, “How was it?” He replied, “The words felt foreign coming out of my mouth…but it was good. Something good.” I hugged him close, he kissed my cheek, and we cried holding each other. It was seriously one of the most beautiful moments of my life.

Just before the performances were to begin, I called my mom and said, “This play feels like it’s bigger than me. Like I’m just an instrument in God’s hands. Like I’m seeing how small I am, but also how much potential I have and it’s insane. I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but right now, I feel very good.”

The first three plays were performed and then responded to by three professional playwrights: Jami Brandli, Georgia McGill, and Brandt Reiter. Georgia McGill is the National Chair for KCACTF’s National Playwriting Program; Brandt Reiter is the KCACTF Region I National Playwriting Program Chair; and Jami Brandli is a published playwright with many accolades. No pressure, right?

When it came time for my play to be read, I couldn’t hold in all the emotions that were going on inside. After the first sentence of the stage directions was read, I was crying. I held onto Lindsay and Brianna’s hands throughout the whole reading and I could hear sniffles in the audience. Finally, after the ten minutes were over, I could let out a breath. My notes immediately following the reading and my respondent’s questions:

OH WOW. I LOVE THIS. I LOVE HOW I’M FEELING. I CAN’T STOP.

-I need to put Emily’s name in the dialogue

Brandt Reiter
-Switch gears from relationship to not believing in God. Why is that?
-What is the conflict at the beginning? Is the dialogue at the beginning masking the problem? If so, why is it coming out now?
-What do they need from each other? What does Mitch need to fix or does he need to let go? Same for Emily?

Jami Brandli
-A lot of ink—what causes the ink?
-Confusion of why I’m having an emotional connection—It’s good, but I want to know why I’m having this reaction.
-What does the swapping of the shoelace mean? Connect the dots!

Georgia McGill
-Did they sleep together? How does that connect to her “glow?” What is the God/sex question you’re asking?
-If they did sleep together, just say it—That’s not the reveal. The reveal is her not having her glow anymore.
-At a basic level—What are those basic facts?
-Location questionable—Almost like a screenplay rather than a script.

Throughout the talk back session, I took their suggestions as graciously and earnestly as possible. It was such an honor to have them give me feedback! Chelsea Hickman, from Kansas, a BYU student. What?! As all three respondents were from the East coast, they didn’t quite understand the specifics in the play about Mormonism and Utah culture—that was their biggest concern. How can I make it more relatable and easier to follow? Finally, the respondents moved onto the last play and I could relax.

When it was all over, I didn’t quite know how to feel—it was done—finished! I kind of felt a little empty. Everyone told me they loved it and were impressed by my talent. Haha That was a little weird, but very welcome and amazing.  Complete strangers came up to me and told me how touched they were, how they were changed, how they felt something. It was SO overwhelming. Happiness filled to the brim, I left the LATC for lunch with friends and called my mom and husband. 

part i  part ii  part iii 

kcactf: part iii

A little late, but here's the next installment, continuing on from where we left off! Next time, look forward to my last day in LA: The stage reading. It's gonna be good! :)

***

When I made it to the workshop, I was ten minutes late (merp). The workshop was, “The Voice of the Playwright” led by playwright Kathleen Cahill. She talked about Van Gough’s A Starry Night. How he created a masterpiece—and challenged us to find our own “starry night.” She had Ariel and I (and everyone else) write down five words in a starry night and then we went around the room and shared our words. Then she asked us what stood out from all the words read. Then, out of those words, she asked us to find the most “human-esque” words—the most relatable to humans. After we did that as a group, we then wrote a monologue using those words in any way we wanted. Then we shared our monologues out loud. My notes from the workshop:

5 Words in a Starry Night

Trial.
Longing.
Victorious.
Alive.
Unapologetic.

What We Remember:

Hope
Afghanistan
Finite
River
Immense
Pressing
Frozen
Light
Drunk
Cyprus
Pebbles
Cityscape
Heavenscape
Snow
Fear: What lies underneath the fear? Anger.
Found
Tears
Bright
Follow-Through
Blue

I’m never gonna be the dad you’ve wanted—I’ll never be him. I can’t take away what I did, put a band-aid on it, and call it good. No, it’s gonna hurt, it’s gonna make you bleed again and again. I wish I could say, “Sorry”…You don’t need a dad. You need to move on. I can only be me, and if that’s not what you’re looking for, then... I guess we’re good.

After that, Ariel and I went to the next workshop on our schedule called, “A Jury of Your Fears,” which was more of the informational and business side of playwriting. We learned the Bill of Rights for a playwright (I won’t go into details about each “right,” but it was a highly insightful talk that gave me an understanding of what my future will look like at a purely logistic level):

In Process and Production

1)      Artistic Integrity

2)      Approval of Production Elements

3)      Right to be Present

Compensation

4)      Royalties

5)      Billing Credit

Ownership

6)      Ownership of Intellectual Property

7)      Ownership of Incidental Contribution

8)      Subsidiary Rights

9)      Future Options

10)  Author’s Contract

The meeting was an hour and a half and I was falling asleep toward the end. I excused myself during the Q&A portion and took a 20 minute nap before getting lunch and attending the next workshop, “Women Playwright Initiative.” Ariel attended the workshop with me as well as Bianca Dillard-Morrison. Throughout the workshop, we talked in circles about what it means to be a woman playwright and how we can bring a voice to the women in America, even in the current male dominated playwright world. What I took away from the workshop was this: My voice as a woman means something to someone—I can change lives through producing my work and it happens through one play at a time. One word at a time. It was an inspirational and insightful meeting! YEAH WOMANHOOD.

Immediately following that workshop, there was another entitled, “From Playwrights to Producers.” I sat through half an hour but it wasn’t shaping into the workshop I’d hoped for (Ariel definitely agreed). I was also getting text messages and calls from Carol and Wade throughout the entire workshop about making corrections to my play for rehearsals and the culminating staged reading the next morning. Ariel and I left and I raced to my hotel room to make the corrections Carol was concerned about and emailed it off to Wade for him to print off the “final” version of the script. !!!! I was so exhausted, but so happy.

As already mentioned, Ariel, Bianca, and I went to get Greek food for dinner together! It was my first time! I had a pita with hummus and other Greeky food in it. It was so delicious! I also tried some of Bianca’s falafel. It was seriously one of the best things I’ve ever eaten. After dinner, we went to see another invited production called “Charm” by the playwright who led the “Voice of the Playwright” workshop earlier that morning.

My thoughts on Charm: I don’t do poetic writing. I do contemporary. I do realistic. I do emotionally connected relationships. Haha Charm, for me, was the exact opposite of everything I am as a writer (which was a GREAT experience for me…as I realized later). Charm challenged me through the poetic and witty writing, the presentational rather than representative performance style, and the overwhelming feeling of stupidity I felt as an audience member. Most of the writing went over my head and I almost left at intermission because I had no idea what was happening. I felt like the playwright was mocking me—alienating me from her work. I hated that feeling—not just for the obvious reasons, but because I desperately wanted to have an open mind. I wanted to understand. But I just didn’t. What I learned: Write in a way that doesn’t spoon-feed the audience or alienates audience members, but encourages emotional connection and a universal understanding.

After Charm, I went to another rehearsal for my show. We did one read through, talked more about the script, and went our separate ways. As I tossed and turned in my bed that night, I couldn’t stop worrying about the next morning, when my play would be read out loud for the first time in a performance. !!! Ariel and I talked. She comforted me and I was so grateful for her friendship.

I said a long, heartfelt prayer asking for comfort after Ariel fell asleep. “You’re gonna get it” and “You’ll be fine” entered my thoughts and I pushed them away. I didn’t think I was good enough. I didn’t think it was the Spirit—I thought it was just my desperation…But I finally fell asleep and all I could think was, “Maybe I am good enough. Maybe I will get it.”

kcactf: part ii

Hello again!
Just continuing where we left off yesterday. :) Read ahead for the first rehearsal experience and my identity as a city girl :) Part I was a little long, so I'm splitting up my second day at the festival into more than one part. Look for tomorrow's post about the workshops I attended, the challenges I had watching a certain production, and the comfort that comes with sincere and earnest prayer.

February 15, 2013

Dear Journal,

Second day of KCACTF was just as busy as yesterday! Once again, after six hours of sleep, I got ready for a full day of rehearsals and workshops. We held our first read through and rehearsal for “The Shoelace” at 8am until 10am with Noelle and Dillon. After a crazy debacle with the hotel internet and getting the script to everyone, we finally sat down to digest and analyze the script!

Carol is such a natural at directing. (As I found out later, she’s also a playwright—therefore, she understands how important words are and how much this play means to me—AH SO LUCKY).

In the first line, Emily asks Mitch about a song he’s playing on his guitar, “Is that a new song?” Carol stopped Noelle and asked her why she’s saying it. Noelle paused and said, “Well, I think I’ve heard all of his songs before and I’m shocked I haven’t heard this one. It’s different and I don’t know what that means. Like what it means for us.” Carol encouraged her in her thought process and I was completely blown away! THEY GOT IT. They understood!!!! The whole two hours were just like that—Each line Carol took the time to poke and prod out of Dillon and Noelle what they were thinking while speaking the lines. Sometimes, she even asked me for clarification and for rewrites in the script (which I took note of throughout the rehearsal).

After rehearsal, Dillon and Noelle talked with me about the script and how it came about (as they suspected it was autobiographical haha). I told them, “Yeah, it’s my life you’re reading…It changed my life in the best way possible. He’s doing really well for himself and we’re still good friends.” Dillon and Noelle took in what I said and the amount of love they had for me was…palpable. In that moment, I knew our friendship was completely solid (or more solid as Noelle and I go to BYU together :]).

I had an hour for breakfast, so Noelle and I met up with other BYU friends to go to Crepe Express. I ate my second ever crepe! Strawberries with Nutella. Yum! Then, I had to run through downtown LA to my first workshop in the Los Angeles Theatre Center (LATC).  While rushing across crosswalks, glancing at little shops, and watching pigeons fly up as I ran by I realized I’m a city girl. Buildings all around, cars whizzing by, hobos in the street (maybe not so much) and the constant go—an incessant need to further yourself. It’s quite the rush and it slammed into me that the future life I could live was happening now. I am pursuing my dreams, in a competitive and cut-throat city of opportunity. Wow.

Note: I didn't take these pictures while running to the LATC for workshops. haha We got to LA a day before the festival started and I enjoyed the company of some amazing girls as we marched around downtown.

Noelle and I at Crepe Express!